"Bye, Bye"--Long

I remember being probably about 10, hanging out at my friend Nicole's house and listening to Mariah Carey. I liked her back then, and enjoyed her songs...at least that is what I remember. Lately, I have not been as much a fan, but I haven't really listened to much of her music.

Like my sister, I am a huge American Idol fan...Did you just know that is where this was going?!? I actually really enjoyed the performances on Tuesday night. I was surprised at how well David Cook did on the song Always Be my Baby. I liked it so much that I bought it off Itunes. I think it is awesome that they have made the performances available for purchase so easily! I am kind of an ITunes Junkie. I probably buy too many songs...but hey, at least I am not buying a whole CD for one song right?

Anyway, the actual point of this blog today was to talk about Mariah Carey's performance on Wednesday night. The performance itself, was fine, if you like that kind of performance. I am not a huge fan of some of the ways she sang that song, but that is purely my taste. I really did like the song. And like a lot of songs like it, it brought tears to my eyes. It brought a flood of memories of my mother all over again. I seem to go on a roller coaster of emotions about losing my mom. Most of the time, I do okay with it. Sure it sucks that she is gone, but I know she isn't suffering and that knowledge gets me through. But occasionally, like during the performance of "Bye, Bye" I rethink about the times that I remember her tucking me in at night. Or about the time that she sat next to my hospital bed, giving up a job that she loved, because I was sick with appendicitis. Or I remember the fights that we got into...Even the rough times bring back good memories, It helps me remember that it was real...But it makes me appreciate even more the good times that we had. I think a lot about the times that she will miss, that I will miss...the ones when I have a baby and she isn't here to hold him. Or the ones when she gets to see the first house I buy. I think about the things she will miss in my children's lives...the graduations, the weddings, the missions, the children they will have... There is always time to remember--and I am so grateful that I will always be able to carry those memories with me. It is a difficult thing for me to be about 7 weeks away from having a new baby, and knowing that my mom won't be able to hold him. I hope that maybe she gets to cradle him now, and hold him tight until he is ready to come to me. Maybe he will have dimples...a friend once told me that dimples are a the marks of a grandmother in Heaven who sent them on their way...He definitely has loved ones in Heaven to send him on his way...

Anyway, here is the video of Mariah Carey's performance.


And the lyrics to the song, since that is the part that I really like.
"Bye Bye"

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

As a child there were them times
I didn't get it but you kept me alive
I didn't know why you didn't show up sometimes
It's something more than saying "I miss you"
But when we talked too
All them grown full things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There's so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face

[Chorus:]
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
"I wish I could talk to you for awhile"
"I wish I could find a way try not to cry"
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I'll give the whole world to see your face
And I'm right here next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye

(Bye Bye [3x])
Bye bye

And you never got the chance to see how good I've done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together

I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
That you can make it through whatever
It's so hard to accept the fact you're gone forever

[Chorus]

(bye bye bye bye bye bye [3x])
Bye bye

This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my peoples who lost their grandfather
Lift your head to the sky 'cause we will never say bye

[Chorus]
(Thanks to www.azlyrics.com for the lyrics!)